Christmas Piano Recital 2018

It was not a good year for getting in good practice.  When we ended up in Utah over Thanksgiving without our music (thanks Geneva for scanning and sending) and then when our minds were just pretty consumed with grief, I wasn't sure we'd even make it to the recital.  But we did.  And you can't really see how much my hands are shaking.  Actually, I found that playing brought me a lot of solace during this challenging month.  Thanks Laurie Shorten for encouraging us! 

2018 Christmas Like Lists

This year I'm taking an idea from Happier with Gretchen Rubin.  Instead of a "Wish List," the kids created "Like Lists" of things that they are currently into.  This can give ideas for anyone who wants to gift them...but I'm trying not to get into the mode of thinking too much about what they want.  It was fun to see what they wrote. 

Ben's is extremely readable.  Only the last thing..diary is super phonetic.  I had never heard of Bey Blades or Bey Blade Stadiums, but I looked it up on amazon.  Seems pretty cool.  

Libby...I love the juxtaposition.  Barbies and jewelry and make-up.  She's growing up.  But she's still a little girl.  

Sarah...Lots of books, of course.  But fun things like an ugly Christmas sweater too.  

Adoremus: Seattle Children's Choir Christmas Concert 2018

Yesterday was the Seattle Children's Chorus Christmas Concert.  It was so amazing.  Ben was really nervous the night before, because it was his first concert.  But he was awesome.  The girls were too.  We love our SCC family (as Libby called them last night in her prayers).   

Ben is the first little guy on the right. 

Sarah during rehearsal.  I didn't get a pic of Libby. 

We had a great cheering section! 

I did get some better pictures on the good camera, but Maren borrowed it.  So I'll have to add those later (see below!  I actually remembered!)
Today is Derek's squad party.  Thankfully Deborah was free and cleaned the house yesterday, so I just have to put together a veggie tray and my appetizer (a new jalapeno cranberry dip I was going to make for Thanksgiving).  I'm also having her come back tomorrow to clean up after the party.

My Mom is BACK!

The last two weeks have been a combination of agonizingly slow and insanely fast.  I don't know how that is possible, but it is.  I came back from Utah, taught for 4 days and then flew back for Friday-Sun.  It was so hard to focus on life when my heart was in Utah with my mom and dad.  But, lessons don't write themselves.  And, since I'm teaching a split this year, and teaching math differently than I did last year, it's 3 new lessons to plan every day.  I thought my brain was already maxed.  Ha!   

They closed my mom's chest on Thursday the 29th, and took off all sedation on Friday the 30th, the day I arrived.  So I knew that she might not wake up while I was there.  And she didn't.  That was hard.  I really wanted to see her.  And the doctors kept talking about low platelets and a slight fever, and no, they wouldn't be removing the breathing tube yet.  But I could be there, and hold her hand.  I got to see the IV tree go from 3 layers all pumping stuff in and out to mostly dark as she needed fewer meds.  

I got to braid her hair while they "dangled" her for Physical Therapy.  The therapists were impressed with her muscle tone and before I left she was starting to help hold herself up a bit.

 It was so good to see my nephews and nieces.  I went to a play with my dad in my mom's place.  I made birthday treats for my brother.  

I held myself together reasonably well while I was there. I came home and fell apart.  Poor Derek.

I made it through work and dance on Monday.  Then by Tuesday my head was raging.  My office manager found a sub for me in the afternoon so I could do laundry, go to the chiropractor and just mentally recover. I stuffed my christmas cards, deciding that I just couldn't write a letter this year...if you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all a wise person once said.  I need some time and space before I can write about all of this in a Christmas letter.  Maybe next year. 

After my Tuesday break from life, I resumed normal functioning.  I called my sister Rachel for a good update on Thursday night.  My mom's eyes were her own again!  She was trying to communicate (even with the breathing tube).  And then yesterday, the doctors decided to remove the breathing tube.  My mom's lungs were strong enough to go it alone.

Yesterday I got to FaceTime with her.  It was hard to see her so weak and tired.  But she said, "I love you." Best words I've ever heard.  It'll be two weeks before I'm supposed to go back for Christmas.  I don't know if I can wait that long.  I just want to see her again.  I want to give her a hug. 

This has been a brutal few weeks.  I'm not sure I'll ever be the same again. 

  

Holding my mom's hand last weekend. 

Her new braid hair-do. 

Playing with Devin at the hospital.  I forgot how much you have to watch kids his age.  While I was chatting he started filling water cups and having a great time dumping water from cup to cup--creating a lake in the process.  Aunt fail.  

But I was busy holding this little guy! So cute! 

Ruger and I watched the Pac-12 Championship game together.  Go Huskies! 

Lightsaber battles! 

I felt like I wanted some pictures of the rooms we spent so many hours in--waiting. 

The view from my mom's room. 

Watching my dad talk to my mom was one of the most precious parts of my week.  He so tenderly cared for her and rubbed lotion on her hands and feet.  It was so sweet to watch. I drove to the hospital with him all 3 days I was there.  We would both get so anxious on the way down--afraid she had had a bad night.  But each morning I was there--she was about the same--no bad news.  Which is so much better than the first week we were there! 

Back in Seattle Grammy and Grandpa Norton helped the kids have a wonderful weekend.  I'm so thankful for all of my parents.  

I'm not sure about the next steps for my mom this week.  They need to put in a permanent pacemaker (the part of the surgery that was supposed to prevent a-fib from reoccurring obviously did not work as her heart is in a-fib all the time).  Then they can remove all her tubes and she can leave the ICU, hopefully.  I'll get another update from my family in Utah later today.

I am so thankful that my mom is recovering.  I cried lots of tears of joy yesterday.  What an emotional ride.

#prayfordebbi #keepfightingdebbi

I am back in Seattle this morning after what feels like the longest week of my life.
Let me start at the beginning (for anyone who hasn't been following this on Facebook).

My mom has has been having bouts of A-fib for a couple of years.  Her heart rhythm would get erratic and funky and they would have to shock her heart to get it back in rhythm.  She has always had an irregular heart beat.  Finally, after she was still having A-fib on meds, they did some imaging of her heart and found that she had a pretty badly leaking mitral valve.

So on Nov 16th (last Friday), she had routine open heart surgery to repair her leaking valve.  This has a 98% recovery rate.  My mom is trying to edge her way into the 2% it seems.

They had to repair the valve twice during the initial surgery.  The second time they used a collar.  It did the trick and they took her off the heart and lung machine.  Her heart didn't start.  They immediately started CPR and put in an ECMO machine.  This machine did all the work for her heart, pumping the blood out to be oxygenated and then back to her body.

That same night they also put in 2 stints thinking maybe the found the cause of the arrest...but her heart still didn't kick back in.  This surgery ended just before I landed in SLC on Friday night.  The doctor told my dad that it was about a 50/50 chance that she would make it. 

All week we watched the red line on the monitor that showed how much her actual heart was doing.  At first it was very little.  Her heartbeat was erratic and small.

It seemed like most afternoons we got good news of some sort. So we would leave the hospital encouraged by progress, only to come back in the morning to see a backslide--or no increased progress.  Frustrating isn't a strong enough word.  Devastating?

This was her heart on Nov 17th.  See the red line?

This is her heart on Thursday afternoon.  So much better.  

All the siblings and grandkids gathered.  We got a grandkid picture.  We played games on Thanksgiving in the waiting room.  We ate at Chuck-A-Rama nearby so we could stay close.  And on Thanksgiving her heart settled into a regular rhythm.  Friday morning they were able to remove the ECMO machine (there is about a 7 day limit on this machine).  Her heart is now beating on its own.  But she is still "sick" the doctors say.  They are keeping her on pain meds and sedated because her sternum is still open.

Chuck-A-Rama, the Kid's Table.  So thankful that my cousin Shelley and her sister Cindy brought their mom, Aunt Sissy to see my mom and be with us too.

My mom bought these outfits and sent them to all her 1st Thanksgiving Grandbabies.  

All 11 grands.  A pretty amazing bunch.  Spending all this time with babies this week made me SO thankful for older children. 

I had to come home.  It made the most sense.  But I was awake at 4 am thinking about my mom.  How much I love her.  How much I want her to heal and be happy again.  How much I want her to be able to hold her new grandbaby Reagan, and all 3 other babies that were born this year. 

Love and support has been flowing in through FB, meals, flowers, hugs, visits from family and friends.  I am so thankful for the faith and prayers of those who love my mom.  It has been amazing. Thank you for your love and continued prayers.

Before I left my sisters and I decorated a Christmas tree in her room.  The decorations are the hearts that people put on the doors of the house.  The sweetest notes of love and encouragement.  Today I am praying that she'll be able to see them. If that is God's will.

Have I ever mentioned that I have the least patience of anyone ever?  All the waiting--when there is nothing you can do is so painful. 

Happy Veterans Day

This week we had Veterans Day assemblies at school.  The teachers planning the Kindergarten assembly asked if anyone wanted to sing the "Star Spangled Banner" for their assembly.  I said we might be interested, and this group did a great job!  Super proud of them.

Medal of Courage

Last January Derek had his hardest police experience in many ways.  I wrote about it in a post in January.  His sargeant recognized their amazing bravery and work and nominated them for the Medal of Courage.  They won!  It was a really fun awards ceremony.  We haven't been to the Police Awards Banquet since I was pregnant with Ben!

Then, November 2010

Now, November 2018  We pretty much look the same.  

Maren, Clark and Anne Marie came to represent the family. 

The squad

This is the picture they had on the wall there.  It was so awesome!  We got to take it home.  

The award

Close up of the Medal of Courage.  

Halloween (the actual day...)

Halloween is fun in my classroom...and fun in my favorite way.  It's an academic showcase that the kids think is a party.  Best Day Ever. 
Students do a project that I call "Guide to the Galaxy" and Halloween is Galactic Travel Day.  Kids read a sci-fi or fantasy book that takes place in another world (or a modified version of this one).  Then they create a guide to help us prepare to travel to that world.  It is a lot of work (especially for 4th graders) but it was really fun again this year.  I upped my game this year with some lights in the room, black table cloths under their boards, and a "travel itinerary" for everyone who visited to fill out. (Basically a future reading book list based on the worlds they found most interesting.)  We then read a Halloween story and played Halloween ABCs.  After lunch we played some Heads UP 7-up to celebrate a birthday.  I was glad it was an early release day. 

 There was no trick-or-treating at the Shoreline center this year.  So we skipped right tho Spiros with the Nortons.  Then Derek and I sent the kids trick-or-treating without us.  (Ann joined them, so they did have a big kid there).  We relaxed and watched a show (we are watching the Rookie with Nathan Fillion).  Then I took down Halloween decorations and we got to bed basically on time.  It was a great holiday!

Halloween!

It's seriously the most fun we have all year, putting our heads together to come up with the Halloween theme.  I think we did pretty well this year.  (Even if we did have some mishaps in the costume purchasing.)

The Dairy Queen employee had clearly never been asked for an extra cup and lid before.  She was so surprised.  And confused.  But I think my "crown" turned out pretty great! 

I was glad I went all out for the Fall Festival--the Superintendent tweeted the picture she took of me! 

Sarah tried to tell me this costume was too big.  Please.  Hers was the only one we got absolutely perfect.  Except Derek's probably.  His is on point too! 

Libby got lots of "Dorthy," we should have picked up something from Wendy's the night we got the BK crown and the DQ cup.  Seemed like 3 restaurants in one night would max us out.  She rocked the look though! 

Notice that Ben has 2 different costumes.  Derek (rightly) felt like the first costume was too black, and too cowlike.  I put him in charge of finding a replacement.  He got the buffalo hat (Ben wouldn't wear it for longer than 2 minutes--too itchy) and the awesome Pretend I'm a Buffalo shirt and brown sweats.  So Ben wore the cow/buffalo on Friday night to the school Fall Festival.  And the Buffalo hat (sort of) for the ward party.  

I sure do love my Burger King.